The Shower War

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Ma here. I thought I would share a little story with you if you don’t mind. Now, those of you who know me very well at all know that for some unknown reason I often seem to find myself in situations where I quite literally say to myself “Now how in the world did I manage to find myself here?”

This story starts with the above shower doors. I kind of always hated them from the first day I came to live on the farm. They are your typical caravan el cheapola sliding glass doors. Hard to keep clean, and they make it a requirement that you have to literally get inside the shower stall itself to really clean good. Hrmmm, yeah… I don’t like that. Anyways, see the positioning of these doors? Well the towel bar used to be on the other side, closest to the door. Now, when I go to shower, I cannot be getting in there until the water is nice and warm. I typically start the hot water and give it a minute or two to make its way to this end of the house before stepping in and closing the door. Several months ago I stepped in and went to pull the door closed and it hung up. What to do? Shower water is running, door is wide open and I’m a freak about getting the floor all wet. So I am panicking, trying to get it closed. Keep in mind I have no glasses on, so literally am blind as a bat. I hear ching, clang, clang, clang and the durn thing falls inward toward me in the shower. Well crap!

Water’s going everywhere. I know something broke off the stupid door, but everything is just a blur. Turn the water off, and fight this door back into the tracks, but still no rolling action. Reposition door to back of shower away from shower head and pray it stays. The door wouldn’t close all the way, but I couldn’t see that. Other door rolls good still, so we will just use one door, no biggie. By this time I’m breathing hard and sweating. Turn water back on – SHOCKED by cold water for a second, then proceed. The door most certainly won that battle but that was best shower I had in months after that little skirmish.

Now, fast forward to earlier this week. I had noticed the only working door was starting to act up. Would roll back perfectly fine, but once in shower the closing became an art. We had a good hot day and had been working outside, and I was quite ripe. I was looking forward to that shower that evening. With the exception of getting the door closed, the shower was just what I hoped it would be, warm and refreshing. I turned the water off and went to slide the door back and hear ching, clang. The first thought to run through my mind was “NOOOO! I’ve heard that sound before!” I was surely trapped. I tried to slide the door enough to grab it on the sides, and you know what? That door hated me as much as I hated it in that moment and refused to budge. No way it was moving or going to cooperate. So here I stand nekkid, wet, and blind as a bat thinking “Now how in the world did I manage to find myself here?” Should I holler for help? No way man! I WAS nekkid afterall. Needless to say it took me a good ten minutes to get that door shimmied back enough to slip through. By that point I was so frustrated and completely forgot to dry off so am dripping water all over the floor – ARRRGHH! So now I’m angry on top of it because I’m getting the floor wet and sweating after just showering. I manhandled that stupid door back in the tracks well, sort of, and gave it a piece of my mind. For the record the door just stood there mocking me, it knew it won that battle.

I composed myself, dried off, brushed hair, and dressed, still cursing that durn door. I went out and fessed up to Pa that I now had broken the only remaining working door. Pa mentioned we could maybe get a repair kit for it. A repair kit? Seriously? This was my chance to banish these doors. My mind was spinning with the possibilities… No more fighting them, no more losing battles against an inatimate object. What was my solution?

Well, to sieze the opportunity to replace them doors. I suggested to Pa that we do just that. Take them puppies out and replace them with a shower curtain. The shower pan should have more than enough lip to hold the liner in and prevent water all over the floor.

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I knew I already had a couple extra expanding curtain rods. I wanted to use the one that looked like brushed copper, but it was broken… go figure. I ended up having to use this ugly green thing. It works though, so I won’t complain, well too much. I had to purchase the holder thingies. I wanted the rolly kind, because the others hang up where the two pieces of the bar connect and I end up pulling the whole thing down in frustration. These aren’t the ones I really wanted, but were all they had in town and were cheap, so they’re what we got.

When I showed Pa the curtain I planned to use, he said it looks like a 90’s Garth Brooks cowboy shirt. I explained to him that we got it in a box of linens from his Great Aunt’s estate and he laughed and said well, that explained it. I like it, not only was it free and from family, but it goes with the ugly green rod. I think it looks better than the doors, is funky and a bit ecclectic. Just my style.

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I wanted just a plain jane clear vinyl liner for the inside, but this was the closest I could find in town. It is cheap and thin, but will work for the time being, and I guess it is sort of fun.

The next issue was our towels. We have a towel rack clear on the other side of the room, but that’s a long ways to go when you’re dripping wet. Did I mention I freak out over water dripped all over the floor? Well I remembered that we had a couple of brushed stainless steel hooks gifted to us from Mom & Pops in a bag of cabinet pulls, and realized our towel rack problem was solved.

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There it is, all finished up, towels hung at strategic heights so as not to drag the floor and yet easy to grab when exiting the shower. I’m pretty pleased with the results. What’s the best part of the whole story? Well, I tell ya, them shower doors may have won a couple of battles, but Ma won the war! One day I will love them doors again, Pa has thoughts of a cold frame already going for them in that noggin of his. For now, I already like them just a little bit better being leaned up against that wall rather than trapping me wet and nekkid in the stall.

With that, I’m out!

Ma

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